The shift

A little boy believed what he was told

That he came to this world to suffer.

This made him grow cold

And his heart become rougher.

Doomed to a life without joy,

he was an insecure ball of fears.

A distant and lonely boy,

Whose sole company were his tears.

Trained himself not to feel

There was way too much pain.

Lived in a world that was not real

Where he kept his emotions chained.

Little did he know,

This made everything worse.

Everything seemed to grow

into an endless and painful curse.

What his mind had created

was his own worst enemy.

He believed he was hated

Empty inside except for envy.

All that he’d lost

Traded truth for “fun”.

No one should bare the cost

Of feeling shunned.

He thought he was smart

Doing just what he wanted

What he’d give for another start

Or some loving guidance

Thought he could never go back

Or change what has happened

Whether he had or lacked

Whether sane or maddened

It seemed he’d lost it all

There was nothing left

He hit a wall

And welcomed death.

But it was far from the end

Rather just the beginning

Discovered true friends

And truly began living.

It’s been a gift

To recognize this lie

I’ve got so much to give

Feels good to thrive

 He was stuck in the mud

And although painful

It was all that he’d known

Until I made the rainfall

 Finally washed clean

And eyes wide open

Awoke to a dream

No more false hoping

 In love with reality

And with my life

Totally in love me

While taking huge strides

 I’ve changed the discourse

The boy used to put up a fight

I’ve become the loving voice

And his guiding light

 Together we’re learning

And growing each day

Like gardeners pruning

Dead branches away

 In awe and marvel

Of where I am today

Much to do still

But plucking away

Feels good to feel

It sits above all

Nothing’s better than real

Except maybe the feeling of love